A Date for History

Sorry date set:Prime Minister Kevin Rudd will issue the formal apology on Feburary 13!

"Reconciliation Australia" co-chairman Mick Dodson has welcomed the decision to issue the apology.

"I think this is monumental. It is something people have waited for, for a very long time," he said.

"It's hugely important to us as nation and to members of the Stolen Generations."

Former national ALP president Warren Mundine says the Federal Government has taken a "massive step forward" by deciding to issue an apology.

Mr Mundine says it will help the nation come together and further the healing process

"In regards to the politics of it all, I think it's really going to set the tone for the incoming Rudd Labor Government," he said.

"It's the first sitting of Parliament and it's really going to set the tone for the next three years of this Government and how Australia acts and what it does. To me it's a massive step forward for us.

(ABC News)
Finally!!

Secrets and Damned Lies

Managing to connect with the past, to inform the present so the future will no longer be darkened by secrets and lies.
I am talking about ancestry.
Whizzing back to 1841 and trying to locate the beginnings of one section of my Australian-ness, has proved to be a full time job.

Who is this man, this man who helped so long ago to create me? This is my great great great grandfather.
Lies, secrets and distortions abound in 2008. Still as the elderly drop from the mortal twig his existence becomes more vague, more covered, more faint, and the stories that are left are either misguided, unprovable, or cover-ups.

We who are left in my generation are fascinated and skewdly proud.
The next generation are apathetically curious as to why we are bothered.
The generation before us are still hiding in their parents fear and loathing at who he might be, where he might have come from.
So far he is:
1 Jamaican
2 Indian
3 Afghan
4 Aboriginal

The mathematical odds so far is "Indian" although some who I have spoken with do not 'recognise' him, whereas some 'Aboriginal' people have said, "yes he is a brother".

Is it racist to look at features, to feel a cultural connection, to recognise innately a fellow familiar?

So I continue my search and along the way am introduced to others who through that vague and wonderous miracle needed to meet, to connect and to procreate for me to exist. Some have died in childbirth, some with a kick to the head by a horse, some in war, some too early with now treatable diseases.
No need to believe in a god, or a spirit world when such vague and incredulous incidences by the twitching of a sperm meeting an egg, divined ones hit and miss arrival on this planet.

It continues......

Invasion Day!!

Happy Invasion day Australia!
Hopefully by this time next year we will have acknowledged
our Nation's first peoples, said sorry, awarded compensation
to the Stolen Generation, put full Medical, Dental care in
place, created more schools and appointed more teachers,
built more homes, provided more running water and electricity
given more jobs, supported more mothers and lifted the pride
and life expectancy of these wonderful nations.

Then I may consider ( ESPECIALLY) if they change the date to
something like 'Sorry Day' ( 26 May) for "Australia Day" instead of
26 January when the English declared this 'empty land' for
Britain!
Bah!

(BTW Computer has been kaputt for nearly a week. Finally
retrieved it after handing over a substantial amount of
pension and have now to get the printer port fixed. That can wait.
Now put on all the Blogs that have disappeared along with the
old hard drive. Blah!)

For all those who want to know what Australian men are
really like, here are a few tips on Australian 'etiquette'.

(Vale Heath Ledger. Sad sad sad..same age as my eldest daughter.
Sad!)

Australian Etiquette.

IN GENERAL
1.. Never take an open stubby to a job interview.
2.. Always identify people in your paddocks before shooting at them.
3.. It's tacky to take an Esky to church.
4.. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5.. Even if you're certain you're included in the will, it's rude
to take your ute and trailer to the funeral.
DINING OUT
1.. When decanting wine from the box, tilt the paper cup and
pour slowly so as not to bruise the wine.
2.. If drinking directly from the bottle, hold it with only one hand.
ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME
1.. A centre piece for the table should never be anything
prepared by a taxidermist.
2.. Don't allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners.
PERSONAL HYGIENE
1.. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this should be done in private,
using one's OWN Ute keys.
2.. Even if you live alone, deodorant isn't a waste of money.
3.. Extensive use of deodorant can only delay bathing by a few days.
4.. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a no-no, it alters the taste of
finger foods and if you are a woman it can draw attention
away from your jewellery.
DATING
1.. Always offer to bait your date's hook - especially on the first date.
2.. Be assertive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out
with you ever since I read that stuff on the dunny door two years ago."
3.. Establish with her parents what time she's expected back. Some will say
11:00 PM, others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it's the
man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
THEATRE ETIQUETTE
1.. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up after the movie
ends.
2.. Refrain from yelling abuse at characters on the screen. Tests have proven
they can't hear you.
WEDDINGS
1.. Livestock is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2.. Kissing the bride for more than five seconds may cause a drop in your
popularity. (Excessive use of the tongue is also considered out of place)
3.. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A tracksuit with a cummerbund and a
clean football jumper can create a tacky appearance.
4.. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for the occasion.
DRIVING ETIQUETTE
1.. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if your gun
is loaded and the roo is in your rifle sight.
2.. When entering a roundabout, the vehicle with the largest
roo bar doesn't always have the right of way.
3.. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4.. When sending your wife down the road with a petrol can,
it's impolite to ask her to bring back beer too.

Connection?

Call it an obsession of mine but I have been interested in psychology and
mental health since being a nurse for the profoundly mentally
retarded in my youth.
Once I had children the interest compounded.
I found these two articles this weekend in two main papers.
Separately they were of interest to me, but together, I wondered
if they could be in some way connected with time and study.

I have cut and pasted the most interesting sections and given
due recognition to the authors.

I am posting it here as I want a record of it somewhere
for future reference.



Russell Meares, 71, is emeritus professor of psychiatry
at the University of Sydney and head of the mental health
sciences unit at Westmead Hospital in western Sydney.

He has developed a new way of recognising and helping those people
with Borderline Personality Disorders (BPD).

Before WW1 (It) was suggested that the feelings of warmth and intimacy
at the core of the sense of self flowed from the interplay between a baby
and its mother or carer.

These ideas were cast aside at the time of World War I, when there
was a shift to a behaviourist approach in psychology, Meares says.
The behaviourists distrusted what couldn't be measured as change.
Ideas about things as nebulous and unruly as feelings of warmth
and intimacy went right out the window and James
(the proponent of this idea) became a footnote in the history of psychology.

However, when Meares was investigating borderline personality
disorders, he went back to the idea that the sense of self was not
a given but a kind of consciousness of ourselves and our place
in the world that grows out of the proto-conversation between mother and baby.

His patients seemed to have been deprived of that interplay or
to have suffered a series of psychic shocks. These traumas, as
psychiatrists call them, are most obviously caused by physical
and sexual abuse, but may also result if children are subjected to
chronic disparagement.

Yet the reverberations of these painful experiences
will cause a disturbance of the sense of self.
"Instead of the warmth there's a painful feeling of
emptiness, which is not in the standard definition
of the borderline condition," he says.

"The condition can cause desolation for the individual,
wreckage for the family and huge consequences to the
community in terms of costs of mental health," he says.

("On the Frontier of Self" Elisabeth Wynhausen
January 19, 2008 in The Australian.)

Steve Biddulph is a psychologist and the author
of Raising Babies (Harper Thorsons).

In 2000 the province of Quebec, populous and progressive,
took the bold step of providing universal day care right down
to newborn babies, at a cost to parents of $5 a day.
It was a well-intentioned attempt to come to terms
with a large increase in the number of families where
both parents were working, which had almost doubled in 30 years.

Three economists, Michael Baker, Jonathan Gruber and
Kevin Milligan, seized the chance to evaluate what happened
in real time. They had the rest of Canada as a control group,
and a large study in place tracking children across the
country to provide detailed data on their development.

What they found was astonishingly clear cut in a field usually
littered with carefully worded reservations and ideologically
filtered reporting. The scheme was a disaster.

But the human cost was the most significant.
There were marked declines in child wellbeing;
on measures of hyperactivity, inattention,
aggressiveness, motor skills, social skills and
child illness, children were significantly worse off
than their peers who remained at home.

The family suffered, too: parent-child relationships deteriorated
on all measured dimensions. There was a significant increase in
depression rates among mothers and a deterioration in couple
relationships among affected parents. None of these changes
was minor. The hyperactivity increases were in a range of
17 to 44 per cent; the skills decline was between 8 and 21 per cent;
childhood illnesses rose by 400 per cent. The study is littered
with adjectives researchers are usually careful to avoid: strong,
marked, negative, robust, striking. Yet it did echo,
though more strongly, similar findings in the United States, Britain and Europe.

The evidence points to only one possible solution: paid parental leave.

In the end, paid parental leave is the most equitable way
and the best value for money.

It is certainly the best for babies. Love, after all, can't be bought.
(Steve Biddulph
January 19, 2008 in the Sydney Morning Herald)

Feline Finds Fishing Fine

All this fishing is exhausting!

Time passes Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do .
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favours.
Careers end.

Not "Lightening Up"

http://www.kateveitch.com/

I just can't believe it.
Here we have a very entertaining, interesting and viable author whose book "Listen" I have read.
She has been 'accepted' for publishing in the United States and Germany and now they are requesting changes to her prose!!
Why?

"They want to make a light line edit, just to Americanise any sayings or words".

WHAT?

So are we to "Australianise" any American books because we are too bloody lazy to learn their weird words?

NO!

How stupid.
I am livid!

"What is an 'arvo' and where can I get one?"

How stupid do you really have to be?
Ahhh that's right, it takes a bit of nous, exploration, time and interest to learn another patois!

As Kate's Australian agent said;
"We have had to work out what 'sidewalks' and 'sophomores' and 'jelly donuts' are, can't they use a bit of nous and work out our expressions?"

I guess the homogenisation or the Americanisation of the world is just what the country ordered!!

Hence Kate was asked to change;
" No worries" - "Don't worry"
"Big-noting yourself" - "bragging".
"Beaut bloke" _ "great guy"
"Fit as a Mallee bull" - "fit as a bull".
"Sooky" - "emotional"

The biggest shock was the request to change any reference to 'underage drinking'.
Geeshh!
In the US version no mention was made of the pot smoking scenes or the sex scenes but
apparently 16 year olds don't drink in the USA.
(Bullshit, Ron!)

All because of some poor woman who did the right thing and allowed her teenage son and friends to have some alcohol at home ( no driving allowed) and was sentenced to EIGHT YEARS in gaol but it was reduced on appeal to 27 months....and what did the American opinion bray?
"She got what she deserved".

How bloody pathetic!!


In the German version of her novel they only wanted to make two changes. One was the name..it became "Ein Leben lang". The other, they put a picture of Uluru on the cover..which is dumb since it is not set in central Australia, but in Melbourne...
No changes to the actual text!
It would be like putting the Statue of Liberty on an American novel set in California, just to denote it is American!

So Kate put a 'glossary of terms' in the book...for the poor Americans who are too stupid or lazy to work out what the words might mean..(look em up in Wikipedia for chrissakes or just ask someone)..but then again why worry when those who are like that probably don't read books anyway!!

So in her book ( which I hope sells a zillion) Americans may find out what words mean;
arvo
wowser
bunny-rug
shag on a rock

Oh and that here in Oz being pissed means being drunk where we have learned that being pissed in America is being angry.
(Like 'gang bang' here means to be raped by a group of men, whereas in America it means to be shot by a gang!)
See? It is possible to learn!

Kate's final word on American's having to learn some Australian idioms:

"I feel quietly confident that they'll be better, happier people for it."

(Information taken from Weekend Australian Review Jan 12-13)

And so it is done....

It is finished.

Another Year..another loss.

Flowers on the grave...January 2008


It is three years since my dad's funeral. Friday was the anniversary of me holding his hand and singing him to Death. Today is the anniversary of the public goodbye.

My sister and I shared some memories.
Here are a couple:

My Sister remembers -

    - whistling....whistling...
- digging...digging....soft, moist, damp earth smells
- "pooh! Facory"!
- passionfruit, tomatoes, swedes, chokoes, mulberries, silkworms....
- soapy, boiling linen
- budgeriegars
- South-West-Rocks and Crescent Head ("I can see the sea!!!")
- fish, scales, guts, chooks, feathers, guts....
- fairy-rings in the grass
- telephones made from jam tins and strings
- brown paper and string kites
- picnic......chop, chop collecting wood
- Henry Lawson....Banjo Patterson......On Our Selection......

I Added -

* Stories stories and more stories
* Bing Crosby, Duke Ellington
* Trombones and drums
* his laugh, his big belly laugh
* his wonder of nature and continual curiosity of it
* loving mum, loving mum
* being held out to wee on the grass at night
* Lying on the floor in the lounge room with the big
old radio in front of us listening to the Goons
* Having the fire so hot he would sit watching TV in
his singlet.
* the smell of his sweat after being in the garden,
that was always mixed with the
scent of chemical fertiliser and cow poo.
* His hands washing mine in the sink with lots of soap,
sloshing and slippery...
* Singing singing singing

So much much more each one of these has a story of its own
and each one evokes
in us a smell, a touch, a time very much connected to dad.

So tomorrow there is another little loss...the palm trees
are coming down.
A gift from one child to her father.
I am sad to lose them..they represent my dreams,
my Bali Hai, my personal dream.
But it is a gift from a child to her parent.
Who am I to complain?
It is to be done.

Sad, private, quiet sadness for the tree-lover, me.
Nothing quite like the moon filtering through the fronds.
Nor seeing the baby birds ( doves, lorikeets, fly-catchers,
swallows, galahs currawongs) nesting, feeding,
flying hiding, sheltering under its nut cases.

So "lighten up Polly"...yeah right.
Nothing shows a hard heart like that comment!
Well 'bugger off' to anyone who thinks caring is intense.

Time, it was, and what a Time it was...

When images of those things that are created
whether of Santa or god or bunnies that give chocolate
When images arose through stories and culture
of the old man down the road or the woman who had too many children
It was a time of influence, a time of consequences.

There it was, swirling slowly, seductively salaciously
through the imaginings of youth and innocence
Forming, reforming creating itself from wild thoughts
of young men up the road and women whose mysteries were beyond your ken.
It was a time of influence, a time of consequences.

To think it all up, in long lonely hours brooding
whether on a bus, at school, at home or walking along a beach
Images arose and secreted their roots into your longings
of dashing young men and their quiet whisperings meant only for you
It was a time of influence, a time of consequences.

Then the time arrived and it was not as you thought, imagined
formed, dreamed, seemed, deemed for yourself.
You took it by the throat and ran as hard as you could
to the furtherest part of yourself and squeezed out your children
through your love, longing, determination and desire
Now you had the influence and you bore the consequences.

And they leave. They leave to follow your thoughts of longing and desire
But they think they have invented it for themselves
of young men and laughter, young women with shiny tossed hair
Moving through and around their lives and it has come
It is for them to influence and have the consequences.

Still it moves you to know that no life can be 'picked up and started again'.
It was your consequence of your dreams, of your passions
that brought you to where the dreams can be viewed from far away and smiled at
of young men and hot desire, of women of dubious morals who fascinate and draw you to
the influences and consequences of Time.

("When a woman makes the choice to marry, to have children; in one way her life begins but in another way it stops. You build a life of details. You become a mother, a wife and you stop and stay steady so that your children can move. And when they leave they take your life of details with them. And then you're expected move again only you don't remember what moves you because no-one has asked in so long. Not even yourself." Bridges of Madison County.)

"In God We Trust"

This is the first One hundred American dollar bill I have ever seen or handled. It was a gift to my daughter before her sojourn overseas...and to actually see and hold a 'green back' with the mighty words "In God We Trust" encrusted on the filthy lucre made a mockery of the great United States Constitution. Money- God, God - Money...nup...does not compute...

"Render unto Caesar...etc".

I remember some Yankee friends I once knew back in the 1970's saying that our Australian money looked like 'Monopoly' play money...well, sirs, now I have see yours, yours has a bigger reputation and yet, it is just a piece of paper, sadly, that could be used by a great many people from where it comes, to give health, food, equality, education and a future. Seems like too many over there are too anxious to hang onto this 'green' piece of paper and too mean to pay higher taxes to help the poor.


Here are some comments on the US elections from some OZ writers to a paper:

Personally, though, I think it’s time for a black President. The great inequalities in American society are characterised far more by race than gender. I also think it’s time for generational change in America, as happened here recently. Both these needs would be better symbolised and embodied in the election of Barack Obama. However, it’s unlikely to happen. Even if the vote turns out for him (will the young bother?), they’ll probably shoot him first, America being what it is, righteous and psychopathic.

and this:


Clinton made some decisions I just could not support - most notable her vote for the Iraq war and refusal to speak out about that and the general abuse of power of the current administration. So despite my years of support for Clinton, Obama is the better candidate and if I was a US citizen he would get my vote and I’d be prepared to volunteer for his campaign. His message of unity, hope and individual empowerment is not only inspirational, but is what the US (and all of us) need. His track record and positions he holds on various issues are all clearly outlined on his website and although Clinton would no doubt make a good President and accomplish some good things for the US and for the world, Obama will be able to truly change ‘politics as usual’. He is offering some clever ideas on a range of policies and issues and also will really open up the process of government to be transparent and honest and involve citizens as much as possible (again, all outlined on his website if any reader doubts what I’ve said).

Obama is simply the better candidate.

It is interesting that we so far away take such an interest in other nations politics. Why? Because they affect the world, whether it be Britains, Frances, Russian or USA.

Guess where I ( fearfully) stand?

Teddy the Cat.

Here is the dry cat.

Calm, blending in, kinda cat.
He is independent and smart, demanding, and hates closed doors.

I think a pattern is emerging here why some people prefer cats to dogs.
Cats are of no consequence.
They don't care about you, as long as you feed them.
They don't need to be walked, talked to, played with or interacted with...only on their terms and in their time frame.
They are not like dogs, who need attention, love, reassurance, who know when you are sick, angry, lonely or fed up.
Dogs need to be cared for, groomed, walked, fed, toiletted, entertained and washed.

Cats are for people who believe in "Claytons" pets...a pet you have when you are not having a pet.
No trouble, no interest, no bother, no nothing...
they don't want you very much...you can be a bore to them and they will trip you up if they set their minds to it...

Thus goes the first observation of being a cat-carer.

No trouble...no investment..no empathy, no compassion...and they wouldn't save your life...oh unless theirs depended upon it...
Unlike a dog....

Goldfish..well they are another story....

Pud -2007

Well I am guessing I have it down pat now.
This is the Christmas 2007 pudding...quite nice really.
We made turkey this year...well, I made turkey this year...easier than I thought..was terrified having a Canadian in the house whose mother makes it every year...she sent some hints..but I was fine..quite tasty but very expensive...

Still it fed 7 people happily.

I think dad would have been pleased and mum proud.

All over, including the shouting. All spread around the world now...Australia, South Korea, Vietnam...an interesting family I have..I miss them...

Cheers to all.

The Link Shocking/ The Quote inspiring.

http://www.theage.com.au/news/opinion/why-10-is-too-young-for-your-first-brazilian/2008/01/07/1199554567704.html
The above link is so disturbing I can't reproduce it here...if you can link you can..but I find it abhorrent.

As John Tarrant in his book "The Light inside the Dark", says:
In the great silence, integrity listens for the true course …
Integrity helps us find our place in the world. This is its durability;
its irreducibility, its affinity with the stones that make up the earth’s mantle.
Integrity stands on the primal matter that we found through suffering.
And because of its affinity with the stuff of the earth, it links us to our grandparents, the ones who are in the earth, and our grandchildren yet to come, whom the earth will produce like flowers.

Maybe that is what I am seeing in Obama right now.
We need more of this stuff called "Integrity" ..it is gone..we need it back in the world.

Clean Cat!!

Proof that cats can and should be washed.
Not only a clean cat, but a good cat.
He has been washed since he was first picked up at a few weeks of age.
He is used to it.

Good Teddy, good boy.

Now.
How do we get the owners of other cats to wash their pets? Especially if they are going to live inside with them.

See?
Even a dog person can appreciate a good, clean, cat.

He will be mine for one month.
I will keep you posted how we fare with each other.

Happy, clean, acceptable cat!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Softly comes the future, in all her inane glory.
Relief is seeping throughout the countryside
and we know the storm is gathering.

Tight times will be upon us, due to things beyond our control
Beyond our country's shores, beyond her far horizons
stemming from a filial land, hurting in her poor.

But yet we bide awhile, stepping back into moments of trust
To recognise our own truths, through Hicks and Rudd and such.
To once again believe in the little things, our strengths.

So here is to a new year, we hope it is fair and meaningful
For all who bide with love and caring, to lift her head again
So once again we can sing, "Advance Australia, Fair".

Happy New Year to all out in blogger land...you have steeled me when I have felt like falling.
You are my silent, yet loud, soft yet strong support.
Thank you for the past two years, when you were there when I needed you the most.

May the universe hold you in her hands, stroke you with love and rock you in her bosom.